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Unspoken rules of the dating world

A new survey highlights that unsaid etiquette often guide interactions in the dating space

In a new survey, over 40% of daters admitted that unspoken rules often shape how they connect with potential partners.
In a new survey, over 40% of daters admitted that unspoken rules often shape how they connect with potential partners. (Representative image. Credit: Pixabay)

In the dating world, it’s the unsaid etiquette that often decides whether someone gets a yes or a no. For instance, if someone talks a little too much about themselves or doesn’t grasp boundaries, they are either ghosted or politely added to a one-date-only list. This was reiterated in a new survey, by dating app Quack Quack, where over 40% of daters admitted that unspoken rules often guide their interactions and shape how they connect with potential partners.

The survey of 10,000 people aged between 20 and 35, revealed the top habits people follow while dating and would want their matches to follow, too.

Also read: As dating app fatigue sets in, singles go old-school

Don’t brag about money

While financial stability is important to daters, people bragging about how much money they have or spend is considered unattractive. About 30% of men and women on QuackQuack said it’s downright crass to someone who doesn’t respect financial differences and talks about their better financial status when the other person is struggling. Flaunting a lavish lifestyle is not getting any matches or dates, cleared the daters.

Don’t judge

More than 30% of female daters over the age of 30 from tier 1 and 2 cities shared that they have experienced judgment from men when they have talked about their dating history. They said that men have told them that if a woman has dated more than men than their “socially acceptable number (read: zero)”, then they have a problem with it.

If a woman’s past does not align with one’s idea of a perfect partner, then unmatching is the way ahead so that she doesn’t have to hear unsolicited advice.

Don’t pry

While it’s natural to want to know more about someone you match, it’s important to understand boundaries. About 36% of participants aged 20 to 30 emphasised the importance of not being too intrusive during the initial chatting phase. Expecting someone to reveal everything in the first few days of talking is unrealistic. About 18% of respondents were unmatched because they asked for immediate disclosure of personal details. It’s these initial conversations that show whether the person can respect privacy and accept boundaries.

Don’t play the waiting game

Some absurd dating rules have come up in urban culture, and TV shows and films such as waiting three days after a date to text, or taking time to respond to give off a casual vibe. But all it does is make someone who might genuinely be interested feel like they are taken seriously. In the study, 40% of participants said that it is mandatory to reply to a message request within the first 24 hours if you are interested. 

Making someone wait or playing “hard to get” is considered unhealthy and doesn’t work in today’s dating scenario. However, if you haven't been online for a while and notice a message lingering for over a day, it's considerate to send an apology along with the reply.

Don’t assume, ask

About 57% of participants from metro and smaller cities unanimously voted consent as the top dating etiquette. If not asked for, sending photos is considered inappropriate, 30% of women shared. This is not only limited to explicit content and applies even an innocent picture of your face. Unless both parties have expressed interest and consent, it’s important to not send graphic messages.

Also read: To live-in or get married? This question has Gen Z in a bind

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