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How to not get fooled in love: Modern daters are once bitten, twice shy

New survey shows that daters share opinions about being duped on dating apps

If a dating profile is too good to be true then it is, believe more than 20% surveyed millennials. (Pexels./Edmond Dantès)
If a dating profile is too good to be true then it is, believe more than 20% surveyed millennials. (Pexels./Edmond Dantès)

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Navigating the dating space can be challenging; add bad experiences into the mix, and one might just want to reflexively shut the door altogether. From gaslighting to ghosting, there are too many ways available for people to make someone feel like a fool in love, a feeling that’s hard to shake off.  As people dip their feet in the dating pool, past can whisper caution. A recent survey by QuackQuack, a dating app, showed that 2 out of 10 people discuss previous bitter experiences in love after they match on the dating app.

The survey involved 11,000 respondents from metros and smaller towns who shared their ideas and opinions about getting duped and how that has made them put up their walls. The participants were working professionals or students aged between 20 and 35 years.

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QuackQuack Founder and CEO Ravi Mittal said in a statement, "35 million chats were exchanged last month, and around 9% of these chats were about daters sharing their concerns with their respective matches about the budding relationship."

Too good to be true

About 22% of surveyed millennial daters over 30 years said if they found a match that seemed too good to be true, well, then it is. So, when they match with someone who says, "I also dip French fries in ice-cream" the millennials have left the chat. The ‘we-are-so-in-sync talk is not working on them; it’s only making them more cautious. The mirroring trick of making someone fall in love is too old and usually just too disappointing.

No social media presence? That’s sus

Three out of eight daters from tier 1 and 2 cities look up a match’s social media presence to do a background check. With digital footprints recording and eternalizing personal data, it has become one of the easiest ways to check whether it’s safe to continue talking to a new match or meet in person. Among the female daters, 27% said that people who don’t have an online presence are suspicious. While not having a social media presence has now become appealing, and no digital footprint at all is a reason for unmatching. 

No virtual meet-up? Unmatched

If a person is reluctant to do a virtual meet-up but is okay to text, it’s a red flag for 17% of women. They feel these matches are not interested in taking things further and refer to them as ‘time-wasters'; flirting with many but committing to none. Daters tend to avoid the sweet talkers, to put it politely; there are too many tales of caution about them.

Too much information, too soon

When a new match starts talking about financial struggles, daters feel it’s not normal, and most likely, it isn’t. When money comes into the picture before you have even met, it’s often seen as a red flag. Disclosing sensitive information and personal struggles too soon is also a way of initiating a conversation that is often no longer about dating and probably never was.

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